Teen mothers have responsibilities every single day that most other students don’t have to face. Mothers in high school have to mature at an early age to be able to care for another life.
Having a baby means having an irregular and unreliable sleep schedule, depending on the baby’s age and ability to sleep through the night.
“I normally wake up twice a night, once at 12 a.m. and once at 4 a.m. to breastfeed Reagan,” senior Kayla Jackson said. “But lately she’s been sleeping throughout the entire night, which is so nice not only for me, but for Reagan as well. Getting a full nights rest is essential for my little social butterfly. Reagan wakes up at 7 a.m. every morning so I take a quick shower before she wakes.”
Feeding the baby, which hinges on the child’s development, also makes a weird schedule. They don’t exactly follow a three-meal-per-day plan.
“When we get home I breastfeed her not only because she is hungry, but for comfort. Reagan is a mommy girl. I just recently introduced baby food to Reagan for dinner. She loves carrots and sweet potatoes,” Jackson said.
The daily routine of a teen mother who chooses to stay in school can be tight and does not allow for much free time.
“I have to take a rushed five to ten minute shower. I don’t have any time to gussy up before school anymore. Since I breastfeed I pump during pride to be able to supply enough breast milk for when Reagan is not with me. So no senior advisory cupcakes for this momma. Oh and Reags wakes up every single day at 7 a.m. so I never get to sleep in on weekends. I wouldn’t change a single thing about my life,” Jackson said.
No baby is exactly the same, though. Mothers can have completely differing schedules because their child is so different from any other.
“In the mornings on weekdays I usually get to sleep in until 9 o’clock or later. Lucy is a very good baby in the mornings and likes to cuddle with Quinton and I. Then I get ready for school and he gets ready for work. While we get ready we usually give Lucy to our grandparents, whom we live with. I get home at 12:30 and get to take care of Lucy while Quinton is at work. Then I go to work at five and Quinton comes home and takes care of the baby. Then when I get home I usually take care of her for the rest of the night,” senior Hannah Bowman said.
Due to media, it is common to hear mainly the mother’s side of the story. However, fathers play an important role in the child’s life.
“Quinton really helps me with taking care of Lucy. We basically take turns on feeding and putting her to bed, and when one of us has had a long day we give each other brakes so that we don’t get too exhausted. Quinton is a great dad, he’s playful, gentle, and is very good at entertaining Lucy,” Bowman said.
Often the future of a couple is put to a test when a baby is brought into the relationship. Some couples are able to pull through it trouble and see the positive side of the new life.
“We got married so young because we both believed it would be the right thing for our daughter,” Bowman said. “Sure we love each other and all that, but we realize how hard it would be for us if we weren’t legally married. We are still kids though, and sometimes it gets hard and we fight, but everyone fights. And we always brush off our arguments, because we remind each other that we have to be good parents and keep our arguments to the bare minimum. We still have a lot of fun together and we are willing to try and give Lucy the best life while raising her, and give her opportunities that our parents didn’t push us towards
However, early marriages can be a trial in themselves. It takes a lot of commitment which is something that young people often find to be difficult.
“In early marriages you have to be patient with your significant other. Communication is the main thing with failed marriages. When you’re wrong you have to admit it, and when the other is in the wrong you have to help them understand how you see the situation and try to fix the problem. When Quinton and I fight we sit down and talk about it and when it’s over we try not to let the problem emerge again. Quinton and I are saving to move out of his grandparents’ home, and we realize that things will get a lot tougher when we do, but I’m confident that we will manage because we love our little family,” Bowman said.
Plans can change in an instant when a student becomes pregnant. There’s the option to stay in school or stay home with the baby, and the option to keep on the college track.
“Before Reagan was born I had plans to attend Missouri State University and follow in my sister’s footsteps and tryout for Pride Color Guard,” Jackson said. “I thought I would have a couple of years to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life. I was looking forward to living the college life, living on my own without my parents, [under] no more rules and curfew. I began counting down the days until I was out of Rolla and beginning a whole new life of my own. Then the moment I found out I was pregnant all I could think was ‘How am I going to tell my parents, my friends, my teachers, my siblings, my color guard coach, my team?’”
Still though, it’s possible to keep on the path to further education even while caring for a child.
“I will go to college. Getting an education is the most important thing I can do not only for myself, but it sets a good example for my little one,” Jackson said.
Teen pregnancies can be avoided in many ways, and learning about these ways has been encouraged for students throughout school.
“We’ve all been preached to by our parents about safe sex and babies and STDs in Health class. If there’s one thing that I hope you learn from me is that you can practice safe sex every time, but that one time you don’t, it could be with the biggest mistake of your entire life [with] the last person you would choose to be a parent with and [be] tied to for the rest of your life… It can happen,” Jackson said.
