Recently I have become aware of a growing problem. Annoying Facebook couples. You log on Facebook and your homepage is filled with their wall posts declaring their love for one another- every two minutes. Supressing the urge to gag, you quickly divert your eyes and scroll past the nauseating posts.

If you have this problem, you know who you are. There is no reason to make them public; no one wants to see them. No one. Yes, I realize that you have planned out the next 40 years of your life together and have the first and middle names of all your future children picked out, but we don’t need to know about it. Text them, call them, or maybe try telling them in person. Don’t tell them via Facebook. But, if you must, and I mean MUST tell them on Facebook, put it in a message. News flash: we can read it. To help you overcome this, I suggest that grow up and learn how to use a phone.

Inappropriate:

Boy:  “I just wanted to tell you that you look beautiful sitting next me, with your brown hair flowing gently on your shoulders.  I love you more than life itself, and I could melt in those deep green eyes of yours.”

Girl:  “OMG lol you are like so cute!!!!!! I love love love you with all my heart more than anything in the world forever and ever, INFINITY AND BEYOND!!!! J J J J J <3 <3 <3.

Appropriate:

Boy: “I love you.”

Girl: “Thank you.  I love you too.”